soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Doom" themed Dreamsheep (DOOOOOOOM)
So anyone remember how Dom/Sub AUs were the big thing before A/B/O AUs? And I mean, there was some overlap in the time periods, as there tends to be when switching from one trope to another, but I definitely feel like D/S AUs used to be more popular and that ABO has kinda taken their place and filled a similar niche in fandom.

And for the most part I'm neutral about it. I've seen some great ABO fic that played with the trope really well, but it doesn't really address how female-assigned biology plays in that system very well. Or with any frequency. Meanwhile, D/S AUs don't tend to talk about non-kinky people or seem to acknowledge the existence of Switches? I've read fewer of those, and naturally fewer good ones that really play with and/or challenge the dynamics.

Also, anatomy aside, I feel like there's a whole lot of worldbuilding that both types of AUs tend to ignore. Like, for ABO fics, I feel like there should be a minimum of three pronouns, since there are basically three "genders": Alpha, Beta, and Omega. If we want to get really complicated, we could go upwards of eight sets of pronouns: Female/Male Alpha, Female/Male Beta, Female/Male Omega, and Female/Male child/no dynamic presented. And then for D/S AUs, I feel like gender dynamics aren't explored nearly as well as they could be, even if "Dom" and "Sub" are the only acknowledged "genders." (They aren't; again, see: pronouns. Every D/S AU fic I've ever read has included genders and pronouns analogous to those in our world, though again, not for the Dom/Sub divide).

Anyway, part of me is screaming inside about the lack of worldbuilding, though usually it's drowned out by the part of me that's soothing it and pointing out the fics are written for entertainment and escapism and it'd be harder to do that with the introduction of extra pronouns and extreme worldbuilding.

But the other part of me, oh man. The other part just wants to smoosh the AU types together and delight in the chaos that results. *quietly creates a Submissive Alpha Trans Woman character and squishes her*
soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Mind" themed Dreamsheep (Sheep of Mind)
Welcome to another late-night post by yours truly! Tonight's topic is the intersection of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria and Privilege.

So on the one hand, I have privilege, and I do sometimes make mistakes that harm people, as hard as I try otherwise, and I should absolutely be called out when I do that. I want people to call me out when I screw up, so I can stop making that particular screwup and do better.

On the other hand, as seen in the article above, feeling like I've failed at something, especially something important to me or in a way that harms someone I care a lot about, can do significant emotional damage. And part of me really hates myself for saying it, but phrasing a call out "nicely" really does help me process better, and get back to trying to screw up less in the future.

And the reason I feel horrible about it, is because that's the tone argument. Or, at least, it's a sibling to the tone argument. "Please make the way I hurt you sound not as bad as you might be feeling, so I can comply more quickly with not hurting you more." I mean, that sounds bad, right? Maybe not terrible, but bad. At the same time, while I do want to be called out when I screw up and to do better, I also don't want to spend days after said callout feeling like a worthless human being. It's not a productive feeling, and while I'm pretty sure it might be satisfying in the short run, I'd like to think that no good person actually wants the person they're calling out to go into a depressive episode over it. (And seriously, how fucked up is it that my brain chemistry has done that?)

So this is what I've got so far:

"I have something called Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. [Include above link] While I absolutely do want you to tell me when I screw up, I would really appreciate it from a mental health standpoint if you did so gently. That said, I understand that your feelings are valid, and my responsibility to do the right thing is not contingent on how "polite" you are when you tell me that I've done something to hurt you. However you call me out, whatever tone you use, I will do my best to own my mistakes and correct myself going forward. Thank you for your time."

I think that does an okay job of stating my case while still circumventing the tone argument (in that I'll absolutely still listen no matter what), but it could probably also still use some work. Plus, I have no idea how to implement it. At least it's a starting point, though. Maybe. *sigh*


Oct. 12th, 2016 12:30 am
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep with a ball of white yarn for a body (Crochet)
So Shaker Meganology found a kitten in her backyard! Actually two kittens, but one of them got away before she could catch it. She did catch one, though, and the kitten is super cute and also blind, and I was just like, I have to crochet her.

You can find pics of the original adorable miss over here, and pics of the crocheted cat charm lookalikeunder the cut )
soc_puppet: Words "Creative Process" in purple (Creative Process)
After drawing stuff for longer than I can remember, I have finally discovered the joys of tracing.

Just my own stuff for now, mind, but I might use official art and photographs for reference in the future.

The thing about tracing that I didn't understand until just recently, is that it's essentially a more efficient way to erase things. I get a pencil draft down on paper, there's messy lines everywhere, I plop another piece of paper down over it, and boom! Only keep the lines I want to keep, no more worries about ripping or bending paper from erasing too hard, no more worries about smudges, just moving my art to a clean work space.

Obviously this only works for certain types of paper, and I imagine that a lot of people are already doing this electronically with this "layers" thing I keep hearing about, but I've always loved pencil-and-paper and definitely appreciate the new directions this is giving me.

Here's some examples, so you can see what I'm talking about; the Tumblr posts include image descriptions.

Whisper Hair: Draft | Final | Post on Tumblr

Pokemon Professor Holtzmann: Draft | Final | Post on Tumblr

I seriously wish I'd thought of doing this when I first drew the Violin Dragon. I might try it anyway; I think I still have the original pencil drawing, and if not, there's always printers.

Anyway! This totally beats out my previous understanding of tracing, which was just, "Use tracing to replicate something and move it elsewhere. Also, tracing paper exists." Bo-ring! This is much more useful. I may finally get some good use out of my lightbox.
soc_puppet: Words "In Real Life" in green (Now showing in 3D)
I worked ten and a half hours today! 8D I am very, very tired now and need a different job.
soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Mind" themed Dreamsheep (Sheep of Mind)
I'm posting this absolutely everywhere, because it is fucking game changing for me.

[Content Warning for suicide mention at the link]

How ADHD Ignites Rejection sensitive Dysphoria: "Rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) is an extreme emotional sensitivity and emotional pain triggered by the perception – not necessarily the reality – that a person has been rejected, teased, or criticized by important people in their life. RSD may also be triggered by a sense of failure, or falling short – failing to meet either their own high standards or others’ expectations."

As a person with ADHD, I would have loved to know why, exactly, I cry like the world is ending whenever I make the slightest screwup. I'm nearly thirty years old, and I finally have an answer. At least now I can use it going forward.
soc_puppet: Words "In Real Life" in green (Now showing in 3D)
[Content warning: Blood mention (in the context of donation)]

So I went out to donate blood yesterday afternoon, and finally made the iron cutoff! Hooray! The center switched machines recently, and the new ones aren't as fast as the old ones, which was a bit irritating, but I got the job done and made it home a pint lighter.

Almost as soon as I get settled in, this conversation occurs:

Dad: So, Socchan, what's tomorrow look like for you?
Me: *already suspicious* It's pretty wide open.
Dad: Think you can help me move a heavy couch into the house? :D?
Me: *...facepalm* Can it wait until the afternoon? I don't remember if it's twelve hours or twenty-four hours after donating that I'm supposed to wait to lift heavy things, but I'd rather play it safe.
Me: *thinking* I'd rather play it really safe and not do any heavy lifting at all for at least three days, but that's not gonna happen.
Dad: Sure, whenever you're ready!

So this afternoon I went out and helped Dad move the old couch out, and the new, much heavier (as advertised) couch in. It was a huge chore that took well over an hour and included a break for me to go to the store to get Poweraide. I don't normally go for sports drinks, but after drinking probably a quart of water and still feeling sluggish, it was very well justified. Worked wonders.

I still told Dad that he's getting someone else to move the couch the next time he wants to make a switch.
soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Heart" themed Dreamsheep (Sheep of Heart)
If there's one thing I appreciate about anime and manga, it's a specific approach to love and romance that they have.

I mean, there's definitely a lot to argue with, as well; there's a hell of a lot of unhealthy relationships, and there's probably dozens upon dozens of essays about the "tsundere" phenomenon, and that's not even getting into Takahashi. But something I've seen at least twice in anime and manga is the idea that you can love someone without needing the love to be returned, and without your love for them being a burden.

Tomoyo from Cardcaptor Sakura is the first and primary representative of this for me, to the point where I've got an appreciative akoiromantic!Tomoyo post half-outlined, but Ascot from the Magic Knight Rayearth anime also touches on it. And, lest you think this is a CLAMP-only phenomenon, I've finally gotten around to watching Petite Princess Yucie, and the same subject comes up in the mermaid episode.

It's a nice idea, that unrequited love can be healing and non-invasive, that you can celebrate love even when it's not returned, or not returned in the same way you feel it; the idea that you can feel unrequited romantic love for someone and not suffer from it. In Western media it's all angst and bemoaning, and when it's not it tends to be tragedy and/or martyrdom. But the concept that you can be happy just loving someone is an important idea, I think, and I'd love to see it more often.

(That said, I do like a good pining narrative; I just don't want it to be the only represented possibility, especially for all the akoi-attracted folks out there.)
soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Life" themed Dreamsheep (Sheep of Life)
Posting these pics here first, because I'm too impatient to wait for Habitica to officially announce the Community Costume Challenge for 2016, and I'm proud of 'em, dangit!

Pics below the cut )

I believe it is now time for sleep, to pass the time while I wait for Habitica to post that dang challenge already, grr! Sometime in the near future, though, I need to talk about the joys of tracing. Because boy oh boy, have I ever been missing out!

Link drop

Sep. 30th, 2016 09:05 pm
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Default)
This is an absolutely amazing essay: The Legend of Korra: Deliberately Deconstructed (Note: Some moving gifs at the link)

I'm not even half-way through it yet, and I'm already a little in love with it. It's a thorough examination of the characterization, plot structure, and social dynamics of the series, with acknowledgement of real world effects (Korra doesn't exist in a void) and contrasting elements from AtLA. It's pulling a lot of things into new - good, important - perspective for me, and for fans of the show(s), it is definitely worth a read.

Edit: Okay, I've finished reading it, and am going to be reblogging it in a bit, but first! There's a lot of images in it, and I'm going to be providing image descriptions here.

Image descriptions from the above essay found below. )
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Default)
I keep trying to click over to some sort of "friends" page or "reading circle" or "following feed" on AO3. And then it's never there. Dear self, AO3 is not actually a social media platform.

(It's probably possible to set up some sort of feed so I can read updates relevant to my interests as they appear, but I'm too lazy to do so myself. Really, I just miss the heyday of fandom on LJ.)


Sep. 27th, 2016 10:22 am
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Default)
So for the sake of clean reblogs and so forth, I'll just be posting all of my VOYA Saga transcripts and descriptions here on Dreamwidth and linking them over to Tumblr. Here is the latest as of last night; there may be yet more, but I've got about six pages to get through on Tumblr first. I may edit to add more to this post if I find any.

For more information on the VOYA Saga, here is my first post on Dreamwidth, which includes six links to my previous transcripts and descriptions on Tumblr. (I may move those over here as well; I haven't decided yet.)

Transcript of Tweets )

Transcriber's note: I didn't actually include them in this or previous transcripts (mostly because I didn't notice it right away myself and then didn't want to have to go back and change everything, and then I wanted to stay consistent), BUT: Both Lisa Kurdyla in her Facebook responses and "Lisa Frueh" here have a tendency to double-space at the end of sentences, rather than single-space. This is something I used to do a lot but have grown out of the habit of doing, and personally link it to more of a "traditional publishing rules" mindset. Food for thought.

My evening

Sep. 25th, 2016 06:45 pm
soc_puppet: Words "In Real Life" in green (Now showing in 3D)
I started an incense in Pokemon Go just before I finished eating dinner, since I didn't have a whole lot to do tonight. I got my shoes on and out the door with about eighteen minutes left on the timer, just on time to catch my mom about to take Chester on a walk. I mentioned that I was planning to take a quick walk of my own, imagining getting home around the time my incense wore off, thinking of joining them for company.

Instead, Mom handed the leash off to me and went back inside X3 I don't actually care very much for playing PokeGo while walking Chester, since Chester is... not the best behaved dog on a leash (to put it mildly), but I figured it would be less than twenty minutes, just once around the local Pokestop and maybe up the hill a smidge and then back home.

Nope! I got to up the hill a smidge, and Chester was adamant about continuing all the way around the block. After making it all the way up the hill, across, and to the point where we were supposed to turn another corner and go back down the hill, Chester again insisted on prolonging the walk for an extra mini-block.

Me, upon getting home: Darnit, Chester, I wanted a short walk!
Chester: What is this "short" you speak of? I am a Dachshund; we only know long.
soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Rage" themed Dreamsheep (Sheep of Rage)
[Content Warning: This long, and somewhat still developing saga, includes the following: Biphobia, misgendering, and conflation of gender identity with sexuality. In addition, many of the links include moving gifs.]

Wow, I wish I'd thought of this three days ago! Would've made reblogging much cleaner.

The following are image descriptions and transcripts for this post on [ profile] bisexualbooks.

For background, see the following posts: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six

Transcripts ahoy! )

And that's it! Phew, my eyes and fingers hurt from transcribing all of that. Time for a break, I think.
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Default) - The confusion of weight and health does a disservice to fat people because people (often including doctors) think that they can look at us and determine our health, it also does a dangerous disservice to thin people who are told that they are healthy simply because of their weight and that isn’t what the evidence shows. In fact, the evidence shows that people’s habits are a much better determinant of health than their size is. - Weight itself is not a health problem, except in the most extreme cases (i.e., being underweight or so fat you’re immobilized). In fact, fat people live longer than thin people and are more likely to survive cardiac events, and some studies have shown that fat can protect against “infections, cancer, lung disease, heart disease, osteoporosis, anemia, high blood pressure, rheumatoid arthritis and type 2 diabetes.” - Those of us in the anti-dieting camp are frequently accused of demoralizing fat people, of sending a cruelly pessimistic message. I’ve never quite gotten my head around that one, since the message we’re sending is that you’re actually allowed to love your fat body instead of hating it, and you can take steps to substantially improve your health without fighting a losing battle with your weight. - It should come as no surprise to anyone reading here that our culture views food as a moral issue. A potentially dangerous moral issue. And, setting aside the very-interesting-but-not-to-be-had-right-now discussion of ethical and religious foodways, food just…isn’t.

Food isn’t moral. It’s not immoral, either. It’s morally neutral.
soc_puppet: [Homestuck] God tier "Mind" themed Dreamsheep (Sheep of Mind)
So I self-diagnosed my Autism last December-ish and have opened up about it to a few people IRL. Twice now I’ve had the response, “Oh, I’m sorry.”

Yeah, it was pretty disheartening that your reaction to me disclosing personal information to you in hopes of acceptance and understanding was instead met with pity and ableism, but I accept your apology.


Sep. 12th, 2016 10:35 pm
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep with a ball of white yarn for a body (Crochet)
Just typed up three crochet patterns, two of which could conceivably be posted on [personal profile] hooked_on_anime. It has literally been years since the last time I posted anything new there. I'm fairly certain I've responded to a few comments more recently than that, but that's about it.

I dunno if I'm officially "back in business" there yet, but this is definitely a step in the right direction.

(For the curious: Fan patterns are Litwick and Queen Shulamit; original pattern is lightning bug/firefly.)
soc_puppet: Words "In Real Life" in green (Now showing in 3D)
Argh, expletive deleted tendonitis flareup >_< If only so many things in human society did not require the use of one's hands!

Alternately, if only I hadn't spent quite so much of the past week crocheting 9_9a It's nowhere near the amount that's caused my past flareups, but it is more than I've been doing, so maybe that's it.

On the plus side, I got all the way through Stellvia Foundation, which is an amazing anime, IMO. Even if she wasn't consciously written that way, I'm nearly positive that the main character has an anxiety disorder or is otherwise neurodivergent; I recognize so much of my own struggles in hers, the frequent crying jags and roller-coaster self-confidence and -esteem, the near constant worry. That said, it still manages to be a very optimistic show overall, and I was honestly warmed through when the het romance happened - and also somewhat charmed to see that it just got more complicated after the initial "confession". You don't get that a lot in popular storytelling.

There's also a background f/f pair which is pretty fantastic, and I just really love all of the characters? They're all so great and well developed. This is definitely going to be a feel-good type of anime for me to revisit on occasion.

Anyway, work tomorrow, even if I did get a really good nap in this afternoon. I'm out of practice waking up early already ^^a G'night!
soc_puppet: Words "Creative Process" in purple (Creative Process)
So I was trying to write a post to share on Tumblr about how (extra) fucked up Beauty and the Beast would be if you flipped some particular gender roles, and ended up writing the story to the end? So I guess I'm posting it here as well, to keep from losing it.

Warning for male entitlement and related nastiness.

Okay, but think for a few minutes about genderflipping Beauty and the Beast )
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep on the Pokemon GO location background (Pokesheep Go)
New icon, whee! I finally made some Pokemon GO icons. I'll probably be sharing them over at [community profile] dreamsheep sometime in the near future, but not tonight because I stayed up too late making them already :P

I need to make more Pokemon icons as well, but tired, so. (My favorite plan is to make one with Dreamsheep as Mareep, because obvs. But there will probably be others as well.)

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