![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
The continual re-defining of self
Dec. 11th, 2009 10:48 pmFirst part of the post is going to get introspective and rambly, so I'm cutting it for those who would rather skip that sort of thing.
It also goes a bit into my bad afternoon, and an aspect of myself I'm finally claiming. If it makes you uncomfortable, I can't say I blame you; it's something I've been working on myself, more fervently so over the past year-and-a-half-ish. If you do decide to read it, I can only hope I come across as positively as I wish to.
( Owning my disability )
I've got other stuff to do in relation to this, including figuring out a good response to "[Try to] stop worrying about it"*, and working out more strategies to deal with it**. But that can wait until tomorrow, at least. Tonight, I can spend the time getting back to healthy***.
* "Tell a fish to stop swimming," maybe? "Would you ask a paraplegic person to walk?" perhaps? Hmm.
** Time to face facts! The anxiety is never going away for good. I can better control it with medication and coping strategies (deep breathing and such), but that "Imagine a day without fear" that my therapist once suggested is an inconvenient fantasy: a nice idea, but trying to get there will likely only circumvent any progress I could make on actually dealing with my anxiety and panic attacks in the first place.
*** Here not meaning magically un-disabled, but getting back to a place where I can actually work with my disability again.
----
Stuff!
1) Have been watching Supernatural. Am quite enjoying it so far, but Dean's bouts of misogyny bug the shit outta me. I find myself wanting to step through the screen and give him a point-by-point lecture on feminism and not treating women as objects/lesser beings more frequently than I would like =_=a Is this part/most of the reported racism/sexism thing the show has going on that I'm noticing, or is there way more to it?
2) This is an absolutely adorable photo set.
3) Camera users! (I'm looking at you,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ytak!) Kodak is made of win and super-awesome. Also, it is -so- beautiful to see the "I'm sorry you're offended" non-apology used in our favor for once, instead of as a way to shut us up. Go read it for that, if nothing else.
That's all for now :3b Mononoke Girls' Academy fics up tomorrow, hopefully.
It also goes a bit into my bad afternoon, and an aspect of myself I'm finally claiming. If it makes you uncomfortable, I can't say I blame you; it's something I've been working on myself, more fervently so over the past year-and-a-half-ish. If you do decide to read it, I can only hope I come across as positively as I wish to.
( Owning my disability )
I've got other stuff to do in relation to this, including figuring out a good response to "[Try to] stop worrying about it"*, and working out more strategies to deal with it**. But that can wait until tomorrow, at least. Tonight, I can spend the time getting back to healthy***.
* "Tell a fish to stop swimming," maybe? "Would you ask a paraplegic person to walk?" perhaps? Hmm.
** Time to face facts! The anxiety is never going away for good. I can better control it with medication and coping strategies (deep breathing and such), but that "Imagine a day without fear" that my therapist once suggested is an inconvenient fantasy: a nice idea, but trying to get there will likely only circumvent any progress I could make on actually dealing with my anxiety and panic attacks in the first place.
*** Here not meaning magically un-disabled, but getting back to a place where I can actually work with my disability again.
----
Stuff!
1) Have been watching Supernatural. Am quite enjoying it so far, but Dean's bouts of misogyny bug the shit outta me. I find myself wanting to step through the screen and give him a point-by-point lecture on feminism and not treating women as objects/lesser beings more frequently than I would like =_=a Is this part/most of the reported racism/sexism thing the show has going on that I'm noticing, or is there way more to it?
2) This is an absolutely adorable photo set.
3) Camera users! (I'm looking at you,
ytak!) Kodak is made of win and super-awesome. Also, it is -so- beautiful to see the "I'm sorry you're offended" non-apology used in our favor for once, instead of as a way to shut us up. Go read it for that, if nothing else.That's all for now :3b Mononoke Girls' Academy fics up tomorrow, hopefully.
