Pronoun Trouble

The basic idea here is that using a feminine term to mean "something to be dominated" (here, physical domination is implied) is hurtful to all women, and perpetuates a culture in which we are marginalized. (Longer post on it here, if you've got the spoons for it.)

Here, specifically, I'm pretty sure Mr. Gaiman didn't mean to hurt anyone. Either he was speaking from unexamined privilege, or (as may be more likely, given the knee-jerk reaction) he has examined his privilege in regards to this word, and justified it to himself for any number of reasons.

In fact, it is because I think he doesn't want to hurt or offend anyone that I almost made my letter up there a closed letter in addition to/instead of an open one. (Social anxiety is winning that battle so far.) It's because I think he could easily come to understand my/our position that I even consider addressing him directly. It's because of his relatively good feminist track record that the post was made in the first place. It's because I think he might be willing to listen, which is more than I expect of people who are offensive because they mean to be.